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Boxer.
When
I use to box I learned that rather
than
sally forth and try and drop the
other
guy in the first round the smart
fighter
probed and studied his man before
attempting
to take him out. I've finished
my
study of you pinkus Poo, and am now
ready
to take you out.Oh, yea! Pinkus Poo
getting
taken out behind the woodshed??!
<clap><clap><clap>
In
reflection,though,I realize my first
impression
of you was right. I know the
character
of man you are...we all do. You
are,
A Pinkus, pinky poo a time-worn
caricature.There
were Pinkus' around when
the
Egyptians built the pyramids. Slight,
nebbish
little men with stylus and papyrus,
hoarsely
yelling at the slave drivers to
move
the men more quickly, work them a
little
longer because theday's quota hadn't
been
met.Master Pinky throws the first
punch!
<whack>
And,
what would ancient Rome had done
without
Pinkus'
in
the belly of the arena so accurately
apportioning
how many Jews would be fed
to
the lions or slaughtered by the gladiators.
Hail
pinky-winky! <another whack>
Jump
to the19th century and we find a
surfeit
of Pinkus' driving,indeed,
carrying
the world into the Industrial
revolution
through your unwaveringly
at
knowing precisely how much you could
squeeze
out of your child labour force
before
they'd drop and start maiming
themselves
on the equipment.
That's
Mr. Pinky-feller to you. <whack>
During
the Second World War Nazi death
camps
surely would not have been able
to
survive (and I'm not talking about
ethnicity
here, dumbkopf) hadn't Pinkus'
been
around to schedule arrivals,
gassings,
mass burials, etc.
Mein
Herr Pinky-furor! <whack>
At
all these times Pinkus' were in
demand
because of a rare quality
the
ability to be obnoxiously
right
most of the time. That is, the
total
obsession of proving how
wrong
others were no matter the
human
cost. And indeed you
are
right most of the time and for
this
civilization owes Pinkus' an
unquestionable
debt. Yet, it is also
just
as clear that the Pinkus'
throughout
history have always been
unsung.
The reason is simple-- Pinkus'
have
always been feared and revered.
Poor
Poor Pinkus <whack> McKracken
attacks
<whack>To the other members
reading
this, think of the fat kid
on
the block.
Yes!
pinky-pork! <whack>
you
know, the one who'd always correct
you
on scoring averages,
Yes!
Pinky`s-balls! <whack>
or
the lyrics to a song you were
singing
to yourself.
Yes!
Pinky-pop! <whack>
The
kid who made the highest marks in
class
and who the teacher said you
should
all be like him while you thanked
God.
You
were nothing like him.
Yes!
Pinky`s-pet hate! <whack>
And
then when you first fell in love
with
computers, the kid whoknew infinitely
more
than you did, but would answer your
request
for help as he did mine
("The
problem is your feeder knows more
than
you do, "you idiot."
Yes!
Pinky`s-pomp! <whack>
Think
back to that job you once had,
the
one you really needed
to
pay the note on your new car with.
You
needed that job and was trying your
damndest
to hold on to it, but that guy
you
answered to- a Pinkus'-- seemed to
be
put on the earth to make your life
miserable.The
kind ofguy who in the
morning
when you walked in and said
"hello"
would ignore you-- why?
Because
he had found a mistake in the
work
you had done the day before. You had
made
a mistake, to a Pinkus this is the
scent
of meat to a hungry dog. You are
mine
to savage and vilify for eternity.
Yes!
Yes! Pinky-player! <whack> <whack>
<whack>
<whack> <whack>
In
this same work setting when things
are
going good and you and your co-workers
are
relaxed and engaging in small talk
and
repartee, all it takes is a Pinkus
to
walk into the room to tense everyone
up,
make everybody wish he'd leave as soon
as
possible.
Yes!
Pinkus-interuptous! <whack>
People
just don't like Pinkus' Isn't that
right,
Pinkus
Poo?
Pinky-passe!
<whack> a pinky uppercut
<whack>
Your
wife doesn't like you but respects
you
because your mates are loving providers.
Pinky-paternal!
<whack>
Your
kids, ofcourse, hate you, as kids
hate
anything even monsters, but they don't
like
you and no doubt wish you would not
come
around when there friends were over.
Pinky-papa!
<whack>
So
your father never went to school,
how's
that?) If you write, you are surely
not
the favorite among your fellow
scribblers.
The one with the best
credentials,
but never the favorite.
Pinky-prof!
<whack>
And
all through your life you've wondered
why.
Well,let me help you solve that
mystery,
pinky poo. You see, it started
out
when you were young. Sadly, one
of
your parents was a Dunkuss
(that's
"Dunkuss" pinhead) the gallus one.
The
one who ground out what little humanity
you
might have been born with and turned
you
into a fully-fledged Dunkuss.
Pinkus-poo-process!
<whack>
You
wrote a story pinky about your brother
who
was gay and was murdered because of it.
you
loved that brother dearly and were just
trying
to get at some of the feelings I had.
I
called the story "stupid," "pathetic"
"idiotic."
I never met you. Had never said
one
word against you yet your need to crush
and
pillage could not be abated. Others
wrote,
and, yes, rubbished your story, but
none
the way you did; none with festering
nastiness
that has always been a trademark
of
a Pinkus.
Pinkus
poo -puncher.........<WHACK>
And
there is so much more I can write
about
you Friendless Pinkus, and, oh, that's
another
good example. I called you"friend"
in
a previous post, after you had called me
everything
but a son of God, and what do
you
say, first thing out of your implacable
obnoxious
mouth, "I'm not your "friend."
Write
soon, Friendless Pinkus, I look forward
to
your frothing Pinkus mouth.
It's
a mouth I know well. I use to specialize
in
putting my big fist through them regularly.
Pinky-punchy-poo!
<whack>
<whack><whack><whack><whack><whack>
<whack><whack><whack><whack><whack>
pinky-poo never
did regain consciousness,
only
the pinkus-poo family watched as I
tossed
his fungas remains into the abyss.
James
Douglas Stevenson.
© James Douglas Stevenson 2005
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